I have been to Atlanta Pride at least three times. The first one I remember mostly a Femme Mafia party in Rachael’s backyard with multiple kiddie pools and enough rainbow jello shots to cover Michael Anthony’s countertop in preparation. The event is fuzzy but I do remember pulling a Brandon Walsh and hiding a too-drunk-to-drive Femme’s keys. I don’t recall if we went to the formal Pride festivities in town.

The second Pride I remember attending was one of the “parking lot” Pride years. Typically in Piedmont Park there was a time when it was in a parking lot instead. Cement gets hot. We went to a lot of booths. I’m pretty sure I was still drinking so that memory is also fuzzy. It was fun but not memorable. I do remember me and Rachael looked cute and did a promenade.

Atlanta is my hometown of choice and I have been here many times in twenty years so maybe we went to another one? But never in the park.

This year, I came to town specifically for the Alchemy Burn, which I attended for the first time last year with Rachael and had a blast. (Podcast episode 187 is my reflection and explanation about the event if you’re curious what a Burn involves and what the culture taught me about community and interdependence.)

It worked out for me to get to stay for two weeks this time, a kind of “work from Atlanta” gaycation and other than teaching Zoom aerobics twice, a pet Reiki / psychic reading, some texting with health concierge clients, I have been mostly resting and prepping for the Burn. Sometimes you gotta trust the flow of rest and work.

Given all that rest you would think the gay stamina and excitement for Pride would be high. Rachael’s couch is comfy, her dogs are great and there are abundant just-for-fun beverages (category includes fizzy water, magnesium beverages, decaf iced tea etc). I checked with my intuition about whether to go to the Pride Festival or Dyke March and I was told that we would have fun and our energy would level up the people around us without us having to exert any special effort. That was enough to motivate me off the couch and into a full face of make-up.

When I emerged from the guest room wearing a red sequin dress Rachael said “That escalated quickly,” and went to go get ready.

I used to try to squeeze every bit of daytime and nightlife activities during NYC Pride (and that area has at least one Pride festival per borough) which is why I call it Gay Stamina Month. I’m grateful I’ve been willing to change and become more in tune with my intuition and what my body needs. When assessing our options for how to have a Pride weekend, I liked the idea of going through the Pride booths at Piedmont Park, the main festival part of Pride with at least three stages.

I haven’t looked at any websites or any official Atlanta Pride communications. One of the best parts of having whatever guest room Rachael has as my gaycation home is that she knows what’s going on and all I need to do is follow her.

She wisely chose to get us an uber to Piedmont Park which is in the middle of the city through the traffic with pretty limited parking for the amount of gays streaming in. (Sexuality is a spectrum, allies are wonderful AND I just like to think about us celebrating the gay parts of ourselves at Pride in defiant rebellion of the heterocapitalistwhitesupremacist overculture. You choose how you want to language that experience!) Also: one of our last remaining Stonewall elders just became an ancestor. Miss Major Griffin-Gracy ascended on Monday—if you’re queer you owe a big part of your liberation to her work.

Atlanta Pride has no cover charge which I think is the correct choice. I worked as Volunteer Coordinator for Jersey City Pride for five years. It was also free during that time and the hard working volunteer Board I was part of fundraised and got sponsorships. Corporate pride is cliche and annoying (and side eye to any corporation gutting DEI while acting like they care for gay people) but it does support the very expensive infrastructure and permitting required to host a Pride Festival.

The Dyke March was started as a protest to the corporate Pride (I have been told by my gay elders) and many continue to this day as grass roots community funded non-permitted protests. I love.

Purity is a symptom of white supremacist culture and I do my best to allow nuance. I loved Atlanta Pride in Piedmont Park! And I’m glad and grateful there is no cover charge.

Rach and I walked through first the corporate tents. The Cocacola booth was doing THE MOST and since Atlanta is the hometown of Coke it tracks that Coke sponsors the main pride stage AND has this rockin booth. Seriously, it’s some kind of trailer with a gogo box inside of it and a queer Black woman DJ on the ceiling spinning incredible music. We got tiny Diet Coke cans (perfect because I prefer the top third crispy part of a regular size DC).

The party vibes were so fun right there at the Coke booth. Coming in and out of the park we stopped to dance and party with the other revelers nearby.

Rach walked me over to the edge of a meadow to see all the pop up tents folks had lined up at 6AM to place for the day. (Talk about Gay Stamina.) A great opportunity for folks to have good seats for the main stage and some shade or a personal gathering space.

The corporate booths continued and we were gifted a lot of swag. It had been so long since I’d been to a main Pride festival that I forgot how much swag happens and was glad I brought a big tote bag.

A sign of the 2020s, since Atlanta recently decriminalized cannabis, in addition to White Claw and other alcoholic beverage samples, there was a THC bevvy sample offered to us. And delightfully I noticed many whifs of vapes and joints as we wandered. I remember in the 2013 Dyke March in NYC scooting into a Manhattan alley to smoke with my friends. I love this evolution since I stopped drinking in 2013 and now just party with the plant.

Rach kept saying that the next crop of tents was going to be independent sellers and then community organizations and I truly couldn’t believe how massive and long this festival was. At one point she said we were only 2/3 through it and we had been wandering for an hour already.

The best booth overall for me was the crystal shop. There was a butch with some kind of rock crushing equipment available for anyone who wanted to buy a geode for $5-$20 depending on the size and get it popped open for them. It was a great demo and the vibes in the crystal tent were exquisite. I bought a quartz crystal for Rach & her spouse J’s house to put under the rosemary. (It enhances the protection and healing offered by that plant, which I suggest by the entrance to the property or to the home or both.)

It took me a bit to realize we were walking by a gorgeous lake and I loved how easy it was to take a break from the crowd and go be in nature and regulate. I loved how the trees in the park provided abundant shade. We passed a Family stage for all ages entertainment (no one performing but lots of kids running around the stage and seating area). We wandered through an artist marketplace tent with little tables full of gorgeous art.

We took a break on a SWING overlooking a fountain in the lake. I love getting to be on a swing built for grown up rest.

We kept going and hit the second stage with drag performers. There were food trucks and a few bar booths.

Walking through the crowd past the booths was much like being IN a pride parade without the hassle and crush of being on the sidelines. I said “Happy Pride!” to anyone who made eye contact and waved the Inclusive Pride flag I got from a booth. Rach and I took some of our best and gayest photos together and we essentially just did a two and a half hour walk around a lake and practiced our promenading for the Burn this weekend.

I like to call things like meeting a friend for a walk around a lake or a fitness class a “self care hang” and this for sure qualifies. Also, we left before we had massive human needs and didn’t buy expensive food and had a great time.

We walked a few blocks to catch our uber and while we were at the light this pair on a red motorcycle stopped at the light. I hollered to the Femme that I liked her gorgeous fun color faux fur coat and then the driver clad in all red leathers pulled off their helmet to say “Bevin! It’s Davey!” and it was the aerialist teacher that I taught an aerobics & aerialist class with in 2018! What a small serendipitous world. And since Dykes on Bikes is my fav part of any Pride Parade I loved that I got to witness a motorcycle moment without needing to get up early for Pride Sunday.

All in all I give Atlanta Pride in the Park 10/10 and highly suggest it for any Pride travel you might want to experience. Delta was a corporate sponsor and I do love to fly with them (not spon, Rach sponsored this trip with her skymiles).

An earlier iteration of Bevin would have wanted to DO ALL THE THINGS but given the evolution of my body and spirit and how I feel in crowds now, the two and a half hours was plenty. I work hard to regard myself with love and grace. I’m saving my gay stamina for Alchemy this weekend and grateful I will have a bed & a chair really nearby to rest whenever I need to.

PS Rach and I met through a blogging platform in 2002 and got to meet in person in 2005. Internet friends are real friends and I’m suuuuper grateful for our passionate confessional blogging in the early aughts for bringing us close and for our long standing friendship! I love you Rach!!!!

More pics on my Instagram–I wish I was a lucrative influencer and could do a giveaway to incentivize you to meet me over there and click follow. I will simply ask kindly–those likes and follows on all the apps make such a big difference for opportunities.

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Beloveds! It’s been many years since I did a brand collaboration. I have very strong ethics when it comes to the clothes I buy and the brands I partner with. A couple years ago I went on a deep dive for hours looking for plus size sweatpants with elastic ankles in my size that were ethically made.

What a serendipitous email to get from Octopied Mind offering to partner with me! Owned by Canadian Queer Women and ethically made with incredible artwork and quality–I’m all in. Size inclusive from 2XS to 6X!!

I hit a freeze response when I was picking out the pieces OM was going to send me. So many great options! Shirts like “Don’t Tell Me What to Do”, “Even Baddies Get Saddies” and the “Adapting” raven called to me.

I chose the “Riots Not Diets” tee shirt in 2X. It fits like a dream (and true to size). It’s their mineral wash variety and its so soft–like perfectly broken in brand new. Breathable and cozy.

At first I thought I would cut off the neck like I do to 95% of my tee shirts because I am a Tender Tomato and get sensitive about things around my neck. (The 90s choker trend didn’t catch for me and I now realize why.)

However, this neck band is actually really soft too. And it’s wide enough that it isn’t bugging me after I’ve worn it five times. The shirt has gotten a tiny bit roomier but not much of a difference in five wears.

I chose the long size and love that there’s an option for the Millenial fav short length tee shirt.

I was shopping for the perfect Cuddle Up and Cozy Down outfit for cuffing season (the season when folks boo up for the Winter–what if I were to boo up what kind of sweats do I want to wear for that) and long is the right fit for me to feel comfy and at ease.

Another thing about the Octopied Mind website I ADORE is that when you click the size on the product it switches the model in the photos to a plus size model or the smaller size model. There are videos as well to show you the fit and flow of the fabric. And when you toggle between short fit and long fit tee shirts you see the actual shirt and the difference in length.

There’s even a very helpful video from the Octopied Mind Instagram page showing the differences between the three tee shirt fabric styles with two different size models.

For sweatpants there were so many options! Right now there are eight! That’s a lot for an indie brand with such a size range!

I chose the Destined to Disappoint sweatpants in 3X. I was going for a slightly oversized fit–the hot girl in baggy sweats look. What a treat to get to buy sweatpants not at the top size of the range just to barely fit over my belly (my lifetime experience with sweats especially as a fat teen in the 90s) but to have room to size up. After one wear they broke in and got baggier and I can roll over the elastic waist band once or twice to get them to be a little tighter.

For info on my fit, I’m 5’6″ with a longish torso and right now I wear a 22/24W on bottoms. Honestly I haven’t been shopping typical retail in many years so that’s a guess based on where my body size is compared to previous experience in plus size retail. (I was a shop girl at Lane Bryant in my early 20s and have worked at a couple plus size resale stores in the past two decades. I have a lot of experience going through many brands and who sizes “true to size” and who is all over the place.)

The COLORS of this brand are sumptuous and the screen print is really well done. Honestly there is SO MUCH work that goes into every step of making garments. Tailoring, fabric choice, artwork, ink choice, size range. The fact that it’s ethically made through each step (even the packaging is compostable and the garment tags are lavender seed paper and will hopefully result in flowers in my yard, Gay Gardens) is incredibly mindful and wonderful.

If you want to visit with me in Gay Gardens while I do my unboxing video for this brand here’s my vlog!

There’s a 30 day money back guarantee and the shipping was so fast to me. I thought because Canadian it would take awhile but I received my package two business days after it shipped. I do live within sight of the border so maybe that’s it but grateful.

Remember use code BEVIN for 15% off your first order! I’m so stoked for the beginning of this partnership and to get to rep more collections as they roll out. Octopied Mind has collectors and a Patreon with lots of first access and behind the scenes looks!

Thanks for tuning into my blog! To receive an email whenever I drop a new article or a podcast episode, consider becoming a free subscriber on substack!

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If you find value in this blog, please consider supporting!

Patreon.com/fkdp (you can follow for free and get updates and freebies from me!)

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Buy my aerobics video! ⁠fatkiddanceparty.com/video4pack⁠

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Welcome back to my series Simple Self Care–invest five minutes (or less!!) in feeling way better.

I’m fond of saying that my spiritual practice is “free game from the universe.” 

If you don’t believe in God or the divine mysterious force that pumps our hearts and animates our breath, that’s all good. As with everything, take what you like and leave the rest. Or just skip this post and take great care of yourself!

We are in a continually unprecedented time and facing uncertainty and instability. We have ancestors who have incarnated during other times in herstory that were unstable and difficult who have wisdom to share with us. 

Since we have free will choice, we have to ask to be guided. And we have to listen (hello, meditation) in order to receive that guidance. According to A Course in Miracles, Spirit needs only the slightest invitation to help out. 

Here are some SIMPLE PRAYERS / thoughts that I turn to when I need help.

Please help me with [insert issue].

Let the lessons be gentle. (We can ask for this and I would encourage you to do so!)

Let this flow with ease.

Let my helpers find me. (Got that from Luvvie.)

Divine Mother, help me give and receive the love I deserve.

Thanks. (A gratitude list is a form of prayer—it’s also a way to orient your attitude and behavior towards what you want more of.)

Wow. (A simple moment of awe and appreciation–I get here a lot in nature.)

DAILY PRAYERS:

This is the daily prayer from A Course in Miracles. I started using it long before I finished the daily workbook. (Probably 2018/2019 and got consistent over time, saying this prayer daily for the last 4-5 years.) This prayer has had a profound impact on the orientation of my life and how it flows.

“What would you have me do, where would you have me go, what would you have me say and to whom?”

I follow that prayer up with this: “May I speak from my highest self and connect to the highest self of all others, seen and unseen, today and all days.” I got the sentiment of this prayer from an Agape sermon by Rev Dr Coco Stewart and wrote it to follow my daily ACIM prayer.

I also add this to my daily Salt & Light energetic hygiene practice as I’m making my energy flow throughout the world “May all leaders know a miraculous redirection towards peace.” Which I modified from something Marianne Williamson posted.

IMAGINATION WORK:

Imagine roots growing out of your body and into Mother Earth. You can go as far as you want. Some folks (especially air signs) benefit from planting into the mycelium network. Water signs could benefit from going into the underground water table. (I got those ideas from Robin Doxey.)

Personally, I go all the way to the core of the Earth which I believe is a star and bring that bright light up through my roots and flash my body once to release anything “not of me or for me” and then do it a second time flashing my energetic body releasing anything “not of me or for me.” 

Imagine a bubble of protection around you. Set the intention that only good can come into your bubble. (I always fortify my bubble with a crystal and set the intention that only God’s Love can come into my bubble.)

Some people like to put mirrors all over their bubble. I do mirrors along the bottom edge and set the intention that any harm sent to me be returned to sender.

Here’s a link to a free Patreon post with my daily energetic hygiene practice/visualization. Here’s a link to a free post about why I think energetic hygiene is so important.

OTHER SIMPLE PRACTICES:

Light a candle! It doesn’t need to be special. It doesn’t need to be on an altar space although it can be! And an altar can just be a special place where you light your candle and have a crystal or a tiny cup of water, maybe a tiny plate for an ancestor bite.

Ancestor bites! I give a little nibble of food for my benevolent ancestors (I’m not feeding the mean ones) most days. I give a little sip of tea for my Grandmother on the altar in her favorite cup. 

Flowers on the altar! Flowers in front of a picture of someone you love and miss! I usually pick wildflowers or something from the garden. Spent blossoms work, too. It’s always about the intention of the gift.

I think these types of offerings give energy to our benefics in the other world and thus help their messages and influence get stronger. 

Ask a crystal to carry pain for you! Crystals love to have a job and when I’m in pain I like to use them to help me relieve pain. I then cleanse the crystal (run it under water with the intention to cleanse the energy) later once I’m through the pain. 

Rosemary plant by the front door/gate for protection. I like to put a quartz to amplify the protection.

I hope some of these practices/prayers help you out! There are lots of “smells and bells” that go along with prayer—my friend / psychic Chrissy Tolley says “choose your fighter” for who you direct your prayers to. I typically direct to the God energy but might also send it to my whole “Spirit team” or name Jesus because sometimes I need Jesus.

I often end with “And so it is” or “amen” or “So may it be” and that’s all up to you. I think the only wrong way to pray is to be mean about it. 

If you’d like to learn more from me about how I have woven spiritual practice and self care to great effect for my mental/emotional/physical well being here is a list of all the Spiritual Self Care lessons available on my Patreon membership! Or you can buy the collection instead of a membership!

Thanks for reading my blog post! To receive an email every time I post a new blog or podcast, subscribe to my Substack!

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If you find value in this blog, please consider supporting!

Patreon.com/fkdp (you can follow for free and get updates and freebies from me!)

Venmo: @bevinb

Buy my aerobics video! ⁠fatkiddanceparty.com/video4pack⁠

Amazon Wishlist: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/1SJCL864DDKEH?ref_=wl_share

Tee shirts: https://genuinevalentine.com/collections/fat-kid-dance-party

Instagram: @fatkiddanceparty @bevinsparty

Work one on one with me: https://queerfatfemme.com/one-on-one-with-bevin/

Podcast: https://creators.spotify.com/pod/show/bevin (Search “Bevin” on Spotify or Apple Podcasts)

You Tube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/SelfCareParty

Blog: queerfatfemme.com

Substack: bevinsparty.substack.com

Email list: http://eepurl.com/dyX3db

Buy anything on Amazon using this link to go to their website and I make a 3% commission on anything you buy! Costs nothing extra to you and cuts into Jeffrey’s profits just a lil bit. https://amzn.to/2PQ52A9

Threads, Tik Tok, bsky.app/, Twitter: @bevinsparty

Facebook.com/bevinsparty

Like/subscribe/review/send a link to a friend! It all helps!