Welcome back to my series about art and activism that is worth your time! I'm the algorithm now, sharing a human being's thoughts about what will inspire you and not a robot's guess as to what will distract you. All of these art pieces touch on mental health and withstanding being misunderstood.
This is a spiritual experience with Prince Rogers Nelson, who has so much to teach us that we still get to have access to on the Earth plane. The art from this triple cd Prince put out in 2009 tells me he intended it to be for psychedelic experiences.
Your intuitive action isn't even going to be the most bonkers thing someone experiences that day, it's likely less bonkers than half the stuff on Fox News. And also we are long past letting people thinking we are nuts keep us from doing the thing we know is right for us.
Most people who offer opinions on my life don't have a life (or a self image) I would trade with them.
I consider myself a '62 Cadillac, either pastel pink or baby blue depending on my mood. But I maintain myself! And I'm getting better at it every day!
"Albums still matter. Like books and Black lives. Albums still matter."--Prince Rogers Nelson
Welcome back to Bevin's playlist! I'm the algorithm now! If art decorates our walls, music decorates our time!
Art is one of the most long lasting things someone can create! I want to amplify artists who are way showers in these Revolutionary times. Here are some things I suggest you check out!
That playlist connected me to a time when things were very hard, uncertain and painful for me as a child without anyone to guide me through it. And now that I'm a grown-up, with tools and patience and unconditional love and acceptance for my inner child, I can be the safe space she needed to process those Big Feels.
It's been over a year and my service has been exactly the same as it was at regular Verizon and my bill is exactly $25 a month (no taxes to me!), deducted on the same day of the month. I have traveled and I have been home in the woods and both are the same as it was before.
"My job is not my identity" is such an accurate thing to say because, in capitalism, making our identity about how we create capital for the state makes that the most important thing we do. I believe we incarnate on Earth to perfect how we love one another and ourselves. That has more to do with being the best person we can be, not the best at making money or being "successful" in the eyes of capitalism.
Welcome back to my series about art and activism that is worth your time! I’m the algorithm now, sharing a human being’s thoughts about what will inspire you and not a robot’s guess as to what will distract you. All of these art pieces touch on mental health and withstanding being misunderstood.
❤️ Dear Mama: The Saga of Afeni and Tupac Shakur on Hulu. This documentary series is five episodes that originally aired on FX but I found on Hulu (might be on Disney+ and Prime) beautifully weaves the story of Tupac Shakur and his mother Afeni Shakur. Afeni was a powerful revolutionary who successfully defended herself in court when she was on trial for her work with the Black Panthers while pregnant with Tupac. The fabricated charges were a result of a series of illegal covert disruption of so-called subversive movements by the FBI.
This documentary taught me so much more about the Black Panthers than I understood. In these times I think it is essential for us to understand what the Black Panthers stood for and how they were utilizing mutual aid and community organizing to help where the government had abandoned people. Here’s a link to the Black Panther Party’s Ten Point Program that outlines what they were organizing to create.
Tupac’s body of work is massive and I had no idea how hard he was working in his short early adulthood. I was an unsupervised 12 year old in the suburbs of Oakland listening to Digital Underground and definitely didn’t understand what he was going through. As an adult artist and activist, I’m so impressed at his body of work and aspire to his work ethic and drive.
I admire Afeni’s recovery from crack and her trauma with that trial and dealing with the early death of her son so much. I’ve watched this docuseries twice and get more out of it every time.
🎭 Megan Thee Stallion: In Her Words documentary on Prime. I watched this the day it came out. The director, Nneka Onuorah, is the Emmy award winning director of Lizzo’s Watch Out for the Big Grrrls. This documentary covers Megan’s grief over losing her mom/manager early in her rise to fame, dealing with unfair treatment in the press after SHE was shot by a “friend.”
A quote from her father that keeps ringing through my ears is “Everything that grin ain’t your friend.”
Megan was vulnerable, transparent and I cried within ten minutes of it starting and many times through it. Fantastic storytelling and worth your time.
🍀 Return to Oz on Disney+. Everyone is talking about Wicked right now, which brings up more of the lore of the Wizard of Oz world. The 1985 Return to Oz movie has little nuggets in Wicked and I was glad I had recently watched it when I saw Wicked to pick those up.
It stars a young Fairuza Balk (The Craft!) and she’s six months from her first trip to Oz and Aunty Em checks her in to a turn of the 19th century mental health hospital for electric shock treatment. She escapes the hospital and returns to Oz not with Toto but with a wise cracking chicken. It’s truly nuts, but the whole movie is seared in my memory from my young childhood. And worth a watch especially if you love the Labrynth, this movie is in the same vein. Jim Henson is not involved in this production but his son Brian Henson plays Jack Pumpkinhead.
(Maybe don’t get a subscription to Disney+ if you don’t have one, use someone else’s or skip it entirely if you’re participating in the BDS boycott to support a ceasefire in Palestine. And we are still skipping McDonalds and Burger King in solidarity!)
This quote has really helped me this week, while 2025 has begun with more climate disasters and chaos: “Do for one person what you wish you could do for everyone.”
A lot of a little is what changes the world. It’s not people moving boulders it’s people throwing sand into the machinery of the systems that keep us down.
Don’t let them make you lose your mind!
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I wrote recently that “Spirit told me to is enough of a reason.” Since most of us were raised steeped in coloniality, which separates us from local knowledge sources, we aren’t raised to trust our gut. Our intuition / personal connection to Spirit is the most local knowledge can get; a person with a robust connection to their own guidance is a threat to pseudo power, which colonization relies on.
Entheogens are anything that help connect you with Spirit. Your gut has things to tell you! Typically entheogens are plants, sometimes these are chemicals. Folks can use their own intense meditation practice or breathwork to reach an entheogenic state.
And, hey, if entheogens are too much of an idea for you, this plan can also just be stay sober and enjoy the experience of art.
I’m a fan of healing with psilocybin and cannabis, so that’s how this entheogenic Prince plan has developed. If you microdose you can use psilocybin or cannabis sub-perceptually. You could just brew a cup of herbal tea and make a connection to the plants in your cup and ask for their guidance. It’s always about the intention, and entheogens are about cultivating a non ordinary state of consciousness so you can hear your intuition clearly.
This is a spiritual experience with Prince Rogers Nelson, who has so much to teach us that we still get to have access to on the Earth plane. I’m infinitely grateful for his body of work and I designed my life to make him a primary influence of mine for four years, devouring interviews, his videos and albums. It helped me develop a sense of value for my body of work and my art that I really needed in order to continue to create.
This experience is designed for what I would call a “party dose” of psilocybin or cannabis. A “glimmer” not a full on hero dose that will make you incapacitated. (I don’t enjoy those and I can’t handle music with lyrics or a jolly walk in the woods when I do them.)
If you’re totally new to psilocybin (or just curious for more info), I have lots of resources to point you to. Here’s a treasure map of all of the podcast episodes I’ve published with women who heal with psilocybin. Here’s my friend Tamara of Mohala Yoga who leads powerful psilocybin microdosing cohorts and can guide you one on one in your use of this wonderful medicine. Here’s my friend Lisa Snyder who leads legal facilitated psilocybin journies in Portland, OR.
The Prince plan!
As you’re prepping your journey or waiting for the medicine to radiate warmth through your body and open up, listen to this interview with Prince and his fav, Tavis Smiley. It’s about 39 minutes of Prince and then ten minutes of the artist Bria Valente he was platforming through his triple cd release in 2009. I get something new out of that interview every time I listen to it.
As the medicine hits, you can choose the order depending on how your experience goes (some people like to dance first and float around later, I prefer the reverse).
Lotusflow3r is the more psychedelic of the two cds Prince released alongside Bria’s album. I think he absolutely designed these songs and this collection to help folks have a spiritual experience and connection. Colonized Mind is on the album and I think it is his most important song and most relevant to our current world.
For me, with plant medicine, I usually like this kind of content first. Something that lets me float around and connect to Spirit. Then I like to use the groovy feelings to dance as I’m coming down from the glimmer, and so then I turn to the next cd in this release after Lotusflow3r.
MPLSound is the groovier, dancier cd of the two. I find that getting embodied and connected to my earth experience with movement is an important part of my healing experiences. And when I can let go of my ego/concern for how I’m moving, which plant medicine helps me do, I can hear/feel messages from Spirit. Try listening to Ol’ Skool Company and not dancing!
Grab a journal and write down what came through! And remember the trifecta for manifestation–write it down, speak it out, think about it.
If you try this journey tell me about it!
If you want to party with me and Prince, I have a whole 58 min Aerobics class that’s all Prince songs! It’s available in my On Demand membership in the theme menu!
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2025 has some of the most bonkers astrology we’ve experienced as humans in 300 years. In this, as in all things, your internal guidance is the best compass. When someone asks my advice I will offer it in the context of “what is your body telling you? What does your intuition say?”
After years of conscious work I now know how to hear my intuition well. For me that’s settling my nervous system, being still and listening to my body. Taking a pause, 24-48 hours, or longer to decide something.
Setting aside time to walk or lounge in nature to connect to that still small voice. Turning to oracle and tarot decks for questions that don’t feel clear (or even just daily advice). Noticing signs, synchronicities and symbols. Indulging my curiosity. It’s learning how to hear my intuition and to follow through with her instructions.
Intuitive development is mostly self trust and imagination, two things coloniality trains out of us. We are trained, not taught, to do what society tells us to do despite our internal knowing. Installing the patriarch inside our minds to question our internal wisdom! Our ancestors had practices connecting them to land and information that is dangerous when power is hoarded by a few who want to control us.
In reviewing my life (looking back without staring, as they say in 12 step), I can clearly identify times my intuition was talking to me but my ego self was convincing myself of something else. Especially in situations where I didn’t feel safe.
Resolutely my body was telling me that I should end my last long term partnership a year and a half before she broke up with me. But I felt so unsafe going into the unknown and all the uncertainty, that my brain couldn’t even consider the possibility that the relationship had run its course. Ironically, after the break-up I had to embrace full throttle the swirling uncertainty of maintaining a house in Los Angeles without any luck finding a roommate. Despite my brain trying to keep me safe by suppressing my intuition, I was in the situation I was trying desperately to avoid.
I went into a deep dive with my therapist about self betrayal and self deception so that I wouldn’t fall into those patterns again. One of my big takeaways is that my intuition has a 100% success rate, if only I had a 100% following my intuition rate! Another big takeaway was to create a sense of safety within myself and address my unmet needs.
Since watching The Bear on Hulu, I started saying “Yes, chef” or “Okay, chef” when I hear from my intuition. I want to do what my intuition says quickly, and that’s still a learning curve. Opportunities are like manna from heaven, they appear for the day and don’t always linger. So since she has a 100% success rate I want to follow even before I understand.
“Spirit told me to” should be enough of a reason. To honor our own knowing and to forge the resonant path (Leah Garza has taught me so much about following the desire path, here’s our podcast discussion about that) that our soul wants to experience. To embrace failure as proof of attempt and the next step towards success. “Greet failure with flowers” as my oracle deck says to me frequently in my daily card pulls.
Your intuitive action isn’t even going to be the most bonkers thing someone experiences that day, it’s likely less bonkers than half the stuff on Fox News. And also we are long past letting people thinking we are nuts keep us from doing the thing we know is right for us.
Most people who offer opinions on my life don’t have a life (or a self image) I would trade with them.
I find having community that supports following our own intuition so key in this. I’m part of numerous communities that center a spiritual path and it’s indispensable as I turn the ship of my life towards my actual intuitive guidance and not just checking off boxes of other people’s “good ideas” for my life (ahem, my law career).
Please imagine me as a fat fairy godmother hovering over your shoulder cheering you on whenever you choose to follow your intuition!
Receive emails with future blog posts by subscribing to my Substack! (Spirit has told me to be writing more for years and I’m finally listening–I hope to help YOU in the relentless pursuit of YOUR joy!)
If you find value in this blog please consider supporting! The cost of hosting my archives and my work is entirely supported by readers like you!
Patreon.com/fkdp (you can follow for free and get updates and freebies from me!)
https://www.buymeacoffee.com/bevin (safe and secure way to buy me a snack!)
Venmo: @bevinb
Cash App: $BevinBoss
Buy my aerobics video! fatkiddanceparty.com/video4pack
Buy me an audio book from Libro.fm: https://libro.fm/referral?rf_code=lfm624922
Send me a gift card or just switch your listening to their audiobook platform so we can starve Bezos.
Amazon Wishlist: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/1SJCL864DDKEH?ref_=wl_share
Tee shirts: https://genuinevalentine.com/collections/fat-kid-dance-party
Instagram: @fatkiddanceparty @bevinsparty
Work one on one with me: https://queerfatfemme.com/one-on-one-with-bevin/
Podcast: https://creators.spotify.com/pod/show/bevin (Search “Bevin” on Spotify or Apple Podcasts)
You Tube Channel:
https://www.youtube.com/c/SelfCareParty
Substack: bevinsparty.substack.com
Email list: http://eepurl.com/dyX3db
Buy anything on Amazon using this link to go to their website and I make a 3% commission on anything you buy! Costs nothing extra to you and cuts into that “astronaut’s” profits just a lil bit. https://amzn.to/2PQ52A9
Threads, Tik Tok, bsky.app/, Twitter: @bevinsparty
Facebook.com/bevinsparty
Like/subscribe/review/send a link to a friend! It all helps!