I just got done with The Schlep* into a new pet sit. Since my beloved Feline Overlord, Biscuit Reynolds, went home to the Goddess this year, in May I started pet sitting. It’s taught me a lot about myself and helped me come to an even more compassionate place about my needs.
I work from home mostly, which makes me an ideal pet sitter for pets who like attention and who need frequent potty breaks. Having cared for now four elder pets and one very additional needs pet who became one of those elder pets, I have much experience. Getting to be home full time with Biscuit Reynolds for five years as a solo parent was really fulfilling and I regret nothing. I wish I could go back and soak in more of his healing!
One thing I didn’t consider when I endeavored pet sitting was how much stuff I use in a week and what it takes to manage *gestures* all this.
In her one woman show fifteenish years ago World Famous *BOB* talked about being a classic car, therefore high maintenance. “If you want to date a Toyota Corolla, go ahead.”
Storytelling is so powerful, it allows us to see ourselves in other people’s examples. Humans are a social species and we understand ourselves better when we have a full range of human possibilities to connect to. (This is the premise of my podcast, Bevin: A Femme over 40 and her Friends, where I highlight many of the millions of ways to be a happy, successful adult.)
This is why the overculture teaching us a false idea of “normal” is so dangerous. Human diversity is very natural! We are all distinct like snowflakes and that makes our species stronger!
Ever since *BOB* said that, I consider myself a ’62 Cadillac, either pastel pink or baby blue depending on my mood. But I maintain myself! And I’m getting better at it every day!
When I was still living in Los Angeles I was touring my aerobics class frequently and I wanted to create a life that supported me being a digital nomad. At my first long pet sit I realized I was, in fact, now living as a digital nomad.
I’m not born organized but as I continue to deepen my self compassion, intentional work I began in 2010, I realize I can learn from every experience and get a little better. Packing for pet sits and travel is vexing as a recovering perfectionist. What if I forget something???
Here’s a breakdown of what I need for longer than just a couple days:
WORK: One bag for technology (computer, podcast microphone, headset for aerobics, my jbl speaker for tunes, chargers), one bag for books/planners/journal–so many tiny books run my life
KITCHEN: One bag for dry goods, one for the fridge. Maybe more if I am planning to do cooking but I rarely do anything elaborate unless the kitchen is well-appointed and the pets are not annoying about cooking. I bring my own electric tea kettle if the house doesn’t come with one.
HEALTH: I take a lot of supplements to support my wellness and prevent Covid-19, the virus that causes Long Covid. It’s a pretty big bag when I’m gone longer than a weekend because I just throw all the full size products in the bag.
BATHROOM: I take my travel bag with me but I’d rather use my full size containers for frugality so it’s a whole grocery bag of potions and lotions and make-up and whatnot. A second grocery bag for bath tub things (salt baths save my life) and shampoo/conditioner.
SPIRITUAL PRACTICE: One bag for crystals, card decks, optional spiritual cologne, aura spray, candle. For crystals I always bring my smoky quartz and selenite when sleeping away from home, usually a couple more crystals might come with me. This sit is long so I grabbed some for the rest and reset and reflecting I plan to do here.
CLOTHES: These are wild card amounts depending on what season it is and how bulky my clothes are. There’s also a bag for shoes both outside and a pair of inside crocs. I also bring my favorite robe with me.
MY PURSE. (I have had to double back for my purse more times than I care to count.)
I alleviate the “What if I forget something????” fear by frequently checking in with my intuition.
As I’m going in and out of the house to load up my car, going in and out of my pet sit house with my stuff, my thoughts can go in lots of directions. I can be hard on myself for having needs and meeting those needs. Or I can surrender to the process and be grateful I have all these things to help me live a comfortable and productive life where I get to teach life changing dance aerobics around the world.
My great great great grandmother didn’t get to wear contact lenses, have hot running water and an inside bathroom or a car! Thoughts of my ancestors help me ground in gratitude swiftly.
It has taken me fourteen years of intentional work on my thought life to think gently towards myself. We have 65,000 thoughts per day. So many opportunities to be hard on ourselves. If we had the typical coloniality upbringing most of those thoughts are pretty mean.
One of the pre-suppositions to the work Leah Garza teaches in the Akashic Mentorship I took last year and Living Systems that I’m taking this year is “People are inherently good and all behavior is a result of unmet needs.” That includes me!
I did a podcast about uncovering some unmet needs of mine in the Akashic Mentorship that really helped me unblock some flow around my creativity.
Being gentle with myself around unmet needs is crucial, but so is being gentle with myself around what I need to do my best work.
Tenderness is something our inner child really craves and needs. I am grateful for all the work I have done to return to the gentleness I was born with.
*Calling the process of going from house to house “The Schlep” began when I was not yet cohabitating with my second fiance, and at the time I had two bags for my dog Macy’s care as well. Sometimes it’s a yiddish word that makes something a bit arduous more fun, and I always think making things fun is the fastest way for me to be more gentle and less self-critical.
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