Ways to Tell a Queer Femme is Queer
The problem is, there is no one “us.” Identities like Femme are deeply personal and there’s no one way to be Femme. There are certainly overlapping characteristics and generalizations that exist–which is how we find each other and create community. Tenderly paw in paw we find ourselves a niche (or several) in queerdom. But it is essentialist to say “This is a trait common amongst Femmes,” because as soon as you think you’ve isolated one commonality about Femmes you’ll find a whole pile of Femmes who belie that trait. This is simultaneously awesome and complicated when you’re trying to spot a Femme in the wild.
Magical Smoothies
{Also, stuff I’ve been up to lately}
I have given up on caffeine and refined sugar again (after a happy Fall/early winter free of both and physically feeling great) and other than being ever so tired I’m doing okay. I’m sleeping a lot right now. Curse the late winter blah blah blahs and the traitor daylight savings sun that makes it seem like it should be a lot warmer than it really is!
Smoothies are really helping this time, the natural sugar pep is waking me up and ever so tasty. To this end I’ve started concocting smoothies from basic ingredients around. I just made this one up and was super happy about it.
Valentine’s Day Weekend Non-Stop Queer Style
This year’s Valentine’s Day weekend was glamorous and non-stop. There was an intense agenda of queer happenings and what better way to get my feet back into the Brooklyn swing of things after my extended sojourn in San Francisco* than to try to do everything? It began with Rebel Cupcake 10: Erotic City on Thursday, February 10th.
Some of you might be wondering how I can maintain this stamina. The key is that I don’t drink much (one or two well-timed drinks max) and I wear flat shoes when I intend to dance a lot. At the end of this whirlwind weekend my feet were actually quite sore, but I felt deliriously happy and incubated in this amazing community of artists and friends that make Brooklyn my home. A community kind of love, really.
Get into it: Femmes and Friends Fa(t)shion February
I present for your joy and eye candy her latest idea, Femmes and Friends Fa(t)shion February. It’s basically a community outfit blogging project, mostly by queer fat femmes and their friends and allies from different body types and sexualities. Jessie said, when launching it, “I want to see your hot ass! I want to see people wearing work clothes, or house clothes, or going out to dance clothes. I want to know where you got what you’re wearing, and what you did to make it fit your body and your life.”
Wyatt Riot on New Episode of the Lesbian Tea Basket
I love traveling queers! Wyatt Riot quit his job and life and hit the road. He’s living the dream! I ask him about that and his fashion on the latest episode of the Lesbian Tea Basket! (And review Stash Lemon Ginger tea.)
Glitterpositive Valentine Sentiments
Happy Validation Day everyone! Chalk art from Re/Dress NYC by Erin Bunny Burrows. This time of year life is inundated with prix-fixe Valentine’s Day specials at restaurants and single-phobic, glitter-phobic rhetoric. (“Don’t be different! Do everything the same! Don’t be a wild pony! Find one person to love and do it in this totally heteronormative […]
Marooned in San Francisco and New Episode of the Lesbian Tea Basket
Just a blog housekeeping note: for some reason the bandwidth on Queer Fat Femme.com went bananas the other day and I exceeded the meager bandwidth I pay for (maybe it’s time I sold advertising?) so for a couple of days there was a blank screen where there once were pithy anecdotes and queer magic fun times. I make it up to you now with this…
New episode of the Lesbian Tea Basket! Check it out, featuring Alix and Jen Gandy, discussion of Maple Chasing and, you know, tea for lesbians.
Special Discount for World Famous *BOB*’s One Woman Show!
Hey Unicorns! I’ve been busy having my Plus Size Party Girl (thanks Time Out New York for that press quote about me) gaycation in San Francisco, but things are still rolling along back home. World Famous *BOB* has generously given my readers a special discount to go see her one woman show next weekend!
It is playing February 3rd, 4th and 5th at Wild Project in Alphabet City (NYC). Here is the link for discount tickets.
Oakland! Rebel Cupcake Meets Hot Box Friday, January 28th at 9:30!
I am super excited to bring the magic of Rebel Cupcake all the way out to Oakland! Tell your friends, this one of a kind performance and dance night is going to be even better because there are so many amazing party producers teaming up to make it happen. PLUS a costume contest! I wish […]
Oakland! Rebel Cupcake Meets Hot Box Friday, January 28th at 9:30!
I am super excited to bring the magic of Rebel Cupcake all the way out to Oakland! Tell your friends, this one of a kind performance and dance night is going to be even better because there are so many amazing party producers teaming up to make it happen.
PLUS a costume contest! I wish I could offer that at the NYC Rebel Cupcake! Make $100 just by looking fly in 80s gear!
Additions to the Queer Lexicography: Sleeper Crushes Edition
Going Out of Business Sale: My friend Jessie Dress declared this term during a skype date the other day. This is when someone moves away and suddenly they are the hottest queer in town. Seriously, it happens so often. Move away, broadcast it, and you’d be amazed at how it really gets people spurred to action. There’s something exhilarating about only getting a chance to do it for a few weeks/days.
Beware, though. I had a friend meet her love during her Going Out of Business Sale and then they had a complicated, sad parting and then moving across the country to join her 3 months later thing. But it’s all happy ending, they’re still together.
“If I declare a Going Out of Business Sale will it smoke out the sleeper crushes in my queer community?”
Art and Soul Tomorrow/Cupcake Cabaret on Friday (as part of Quorum Forum)
I am really excited to be producing this celebration of self-love at this amazing free, community festival of queer magic in the middle of Winter. I’m calling Quorum Forum the Queer Winter Olympics. And thrilled to bring together this awesome line-up of performers. I hope you can make it! If anyone can video tape it please let me know!