(This post is part of a series of daily letters from me to my future children reporting from the emerging paradigm.)
Dear Kids:
Yesterday I talked about learning from failure. Today I want to talk about something that’s helped my learning process a lot. Slowing down.
When I was deep in perfectionism and people pleasing, I was really intense. Not in the best way. I would speed over connection to get to the point, I would barrel past non verbal cues and I assumed everyone out there had the same goals I did.
This doesn’t actually reflect my values–especially around diversity. Understanding and accepting that everyone is different, coming from different points of view and has different goals is really important!
This is actually very meaningful to me now as I truly believe human diversity is our strength as a species and everything that makes us different is important!
But constantly being in a rush, focused only on my point of view and not taking into consideration different communication styles or what someone was really communicating was a huge liability. 85% of job advancement is based on people skills, according to research by Stanford, Harvard and the Carnegie Foundation. Developing those I’ve realized how much slower I need to go in order to have the connections and depth with folks that my Scorpio Moon desires!
I’ve done so much study in the area of people skills and a lot of what I’ve learned is to slow down and focus on quality connection. And slowing down enables me to really learn and sift from what I go through. When I was barrelling past niceties, I was also not slowing down to evaluate.
Get clear about what’s really important in this world–relationships, and prioritize accordingly. Quality of life is on the other side of that!
xoxo,
Mom
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