Boss Up with Bevin Your dream life is at the end of your comfort zone

2015-03-25

Florida Keys: Wandering Key West and “The Art of Doing Nothing”

Dara and I spent three days total in Key West. We drove down there from our cabin on Big Pine Key and spent the day after our paddleboard yoga adventure tooling around. I noticed the tourist crowd was pretty mainstream, which surprised both of us because we had the impression that Key West was pretty queer. From all I had heard about Key West I expected a hearty smattering of weirdos and did not find many. (Turns out they come during specific events and take over Key West.)

16143916734_2af8aa442f_zThere are a lot of super flamboyant amazing things in Key West, which made me think weirdos would love this place and flock to it.

All of the locals we interacted with were fantastic and super weird. Whether weird in appearance or not, upon interacting with them they were definitely not what I would call “normals” and were lively, fun folks.* It was the tourists who had me on guard. (Unbeknownst to us, it was Spring Break.) Dara would literally count on one hand the amount of visibly lesbian or gay couples we saw during our time there.

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That first day we wandered Key West I noticed the tourist crowd, but quickly ignored it to enjoy the beauty of the old wooden houses and taking our wander through the town. It was so lovely.

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Before Paddleboard Yoga we took a walk down a random beach street we found and enjoyed how friendly most folks were. I loved peeping into the water for schools of fish. (I only found one.)

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We had a great lunch at Pepe’s, suggested by an instagrammer I follow when I asked him about Key West. (He’s a minister and the gay dad of one of my favorite bloggers–if you like spiritual musings and great landscaping, request to follow Poppa143.)

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They served iced tea by the pitcher, and a cat was sleeping on the sun roof above us in the outdoor patio! Clearly I was smitten with this place.

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16143911324_2c5e75337d_zI found a spot in the marina that sells fish food and got to feed really huge, beautiful fish! I loved it so much we came back to do it again on our third day in Key West and that time saw a Nurse Shark dive in and grab a fish who was snacking on our fish food. Insert complex feelings about the circle of life.

On our mid-afternoon wander we ended up on the main drag of Duval Street and I started to feel kind of woozy and nauseous. It took me a few minutes to realize I was getting heat sick, needed to sit down and drink a lot of water. I usually only get heat sick when the temp is in the high 90s or above. Even though Key West was only in the 80s the sun was very intense. I noticed a sharp difference once my hair was up, I had cold water and we were walking on the shady side of the street.

16558949707_5821421fb5_zDuval Street, in the deep afternoon sun.

After I was heat sick we stopped in at this really cute coffee shop for an hour and played chess under their fans and drank frothy iced coffees. It was inside a converted old wooden house and was really cool to get to experience the inside of a gorgeous house. They also had some porch seats but that was too hot for me, as I was a wilted flower.

16578739000_a91afc4515_zThe coffee shop is across the street from Pepe’s.

I noticed the coffee shop had a real estate office inside of it and I fantasized about being a realtor in a cute coffee shop. One of the little wooden houses-turned-hotels that goes for $400 a night has a “liming hour” from 4-5 where they encourage guests to sit and literally do nothing. (Theirs includes an alcoholic beverage; upon some internet research I think the term “liming hour” might be appropriated from Caribbean culture.) I love the idea of valuing the art of doing nothing, though, and it was definitely needed given how sharp the sun is! I was glad we found a coffee shop to have that moment.

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I’ve learned a lesson about sunny adventure vacations and booking in time to just chillax.

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After our rest, we ticked off some more tourist bucket list. The Southernmost Point in the Continental US is a must. You have to stand in line to take a photo!

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20150305_165357Dara wanted a photo on the REAL southernmost point, which was the little wall behind the buoy. I used the selfie stick. Yes, we got a selfie stick for this vacation.

We did sunset at Mallory Square. We watched a pig named Snorkel perform for tips with a foulmouthed gentleman making dad jokes. I tipped him $8 and another few when he offered photo ops with Snorkel.

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We had a mediocre dinner at a taco place called Amigos that enabled views of the touristy Duval Street. I realized once we got our food that the four stars on Yelp were for the ambiance of being in the “party.” Does anyone else feel annoyed when you eat out and the food isn’t amazing? I’m just always interested in delicious food first and making scrumptious nachos is not difficult.

16578712328_4a8e89ae0d_zNacho view.

IMG_20150305_192722253Nacho selfie.

Our post nachos, dog tired bodies wandered down an adorable street lamp lit alleyway listening to birdsong (at night!) and settled in for the 45 minute drive back to Big Pine Key. That was the night Dara got bit over 100 times by a spider. Her bites are still healing, almost three weeks later.

*Many of them suggested the Green Parrot as the bar and live music venue to check out. We don’t drink so we didn’t end up prioritizing a bar but I wanted to pass on the suggestion to my readers!

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Everyday Glitter

My yoga teacher says at the end of each class “The light in me bows down to the light and the teacher in all of you.” I definitely feel that teaching is a two way process. I get just as much out of mentoring people, teaching workshops and writing this blog as people tell me they get out of those classes or this website. I treasure each compliment and appreciate them more than you know. But even more so, doing the art I do, blogging, writing, performing, producing, helps me to keep going on this journey, this lifetime journey, to loving myself. Teaching the gems I’ve mined about learning to love yourself and your body helps me mine even more gems.

At my workshop at Swarthmore I compared and contrasted the mainstream standards of beauty with what an alternative standard of beauty would look like. The gist of the mainstream standard is that it is virtually impossible to achieve and creates insecurity. An alternative standard is fluid. I said to the attendees, “You are all beautiful right this minute. The thing we need to learn is how to see ourselves as beautiful.”

I’ve talked about celebrating the fact that we are glitter identified people on the blog before. But I’d like to get deeper and start thinking about what are we doing every day that is putting together our amazing glittery lives? How are our lives beautiful right this minute? Where is our “too much” coming from, piece by piece?

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Sometimes my glitter literally comes in fistfuls from gay boys at dance parties. Hey Queen, July 2010.

Sometimes I find reading other people’s shines* really inspirational so hopefully you will find mine inspirational, too.

1. Spring! It’s still hovering in the 40s but today we got a couple of moments where it was downright near 60. I took my hoodie off for a precious brisk walk from the car to the grocery store. And not to be deterred, the birds are back chirping up a storm in the morning and some of the more dedicated early bloomers are thrusting forth.

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I spend a lot of time with my face toward the sky inspecting the trees for budding leaves. You can just barely make out silhouettes of buds here. All photos taken today in Park Slope, Brooklyn.

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2. The perfect color of aubergine. For months I’ve wanted these deep purple sheets I saw on a reality show. Today at an impromptu trip to Ikea with Mackenzi I found a bedspread in that exact shade of aubergine, perfectly slippery so as to repel cat hair.

We went to scope out entertainment center options for my great living room redecoration project. Might as well start with a fast and easy fix to revolutionize my bedroom and acknowledge the continued need for comforters. I feel like the reverse of the Princess and the Pea. Instead of adding mattresses for comfort I am adding comforters for warmth!

3. The ridiculousness of an ornate cat food bowl. I couldn’t think of a more perfect setting for my cats to eat from, and a nod to old school Fancy Feast branding. (Note I feed them Nutro Indoor Senior food, not Fancy Feast.)

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They have to eat atop a chair so Macy can’t get into their food. I think it needs some sort of silver tray.

4. Mackenzi shouts to me, “Sugar Free Bacon Vinaigrette!” from across the aisle in the grocery store. I yell back “What has you speaking my love language?”

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It’s this miracle my lovelies. I can’t wait to try it out. It’s made with real bacon and comes from some maple farm.**

5. New gays moved into the loftiminiums across the street from my apartment!

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6. Trading coffees with Heather! Bedford Hill, the new coffee shop on my corner is awesome. They have a board where you can buy your friend a coffee and chalk it up for them to find. I bought Heather a coffee to help her with planning her tour (hey midwest! go see the Heels on Wheels Road Show!) and she reciprocated! I went down there and worked on my memoir today.

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Also the staff is really nice and cute. Their egg, avocado, cheese bagel sandwich will change your life.

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Heather and Damien are going to put on an amazing tour as soon as they finish reading this book about unicorns at a house party!

7. Brunch with friends! I am on this aggressively pursuing brunch on Sundays kick. I have worked retail so many weekends it kills it for me trying to do muggle brunch timing. But I miss my friends and I want to share cheap eats with them!

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I hope you are all putting your glitter out there this week!

*Shines and whines were something my college Resident Advisor staff used to do at staff meetings and I love them. It’s a way to communicate your highs and lows.
**Recall how much of a maple chaser I am.

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