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Get Some South in Yo’ Mouth!: Lola Dean’s Time-Tested Tips for the Ultimate Blow Job Performance

March 14th, 2010 · 4 Comments

If you’re thinking of giving your lover(s) the royal treatment on “Steak and Blow Job Day,” I would encourage you to brush up on your oral service skills to make the holiday special and unforgettable. A full belly can only be complemented by a great blow job, so take your task seriously, and your sweetheart(s) will sing your praises…quite literally. Many of us (but certainly not all) queer femmes service our lover(s)’ not-so-permanent cocks (i.e. dildos and toys), and while this is my specialty, I think these tips can be applied across the board for all body types and genders. First, remember this is a performance, so show us what you got! You are front and center, so pull all the stops, and dazzle your sweetheart by following these three tips:

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Tags: Fat Femme Foodie · Glitter on the Mattress · Queer Oprah

Additions to the Queer Lexicography: Ages and Dating and PR

September 18th, 2009 · 1 Comment

A Tiny is someone who is in their barely twenties.* Tinies can be great. They are someone you can be really tender with because of their stark vulnerability in contrast to your older jadedness. They can be really fun to corrupt. They can also help you not take things so seriously. Tinies sometimes have more active sex drives. They can make you feel really old when they don’t understand your Jem and the Holograms references.

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Tags: Glitter on the Mattress · Queer Fat Femme and the City · queer lexicography

Additions to the Queer Lexicography: Polyamory Edition

July 16th, 2009 · No Comments

Side Dish: An apt way to describe a special lover who is not your main lover or partner. As further explicated by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha when I threw the term around her the other day: “You can enjoy a meaty entrée on its own, but how much better is it with a delicious side of greens or okra? Giving you vitamins and tastes that you just don’t get with the main dish. Making both taste more delightful in the mouth. How lovely.”

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Tags: Glitter on the Mattress · Queer Fat Femme and the City · queer lexicography

FemmeCast Episode 8: That’s My Jam!!

April 1st, 2009 · 1 Comment

“We’re fierce but not nuts, we’re the Sharks!”–Leah, Epsiode 8 of FemmeCast

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Tags: Events and Announcements · FemmeCast

Brian says this man was sent to me by Jesus

January 10th, 2009 · 2 Comments

“Oh Luis, if I weren’t a lesbian I’d have such a crush on you.” He then told me about his daughter who is a lesbian. She’s in her mid-twenties and he said, “I just love her so much but I feel like I failed as a father.”

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Tags: Glitter on the Front Porch · Glitter on the Mattress · Queer Fat Femme and the City · Queer Oprah

Correspondence: Greeneyes

December 15th, 2008 · 4 Comments

VIA MYSPACE
—————– Original Message —————–
From: greeneyes
Date: Dec 14, 2008 10:41 PM
Subject: Please read!
Will pay women stand on me at once at crush me under their weight like a roach..
Dear Greeneyes:
When I was a Senior in college I took a Human Sexuality class and the professor said something I paraphrase below that has really stuck [...]

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Tags: Queer Fat Femme and the City