Fatting Around The Premier Party for TLC’s “Big Sexy”

My dear friend Leslie is on a new show on TLC called Big Sexy*. It follows the lives of five New York City women aged 24-30something who are all plus size and work in the thin-centric fashion industry. Big Sexy premiered last night and has two more episodes that air on Tuesday nights at 10PM. I’m sure the first episode will re-run a few times this week.
Leslie and her fellow cast mates organized a viewing party for their friends and family at a big sports bar in Times Square.

Additions to the Queer Lexicography: Pride Edition

It has been a few months since I’ve updated the Queer Lexicography! Sex Tornado: You know how when you have a sexy romp and it goes on for hours and sometimes it lands in multiple rooms? Like the couch cushions are on the floor, there’s sex ephemera everywhere (bottles of lube, toys, wrappers), clothes crumpled places, the bed blankets are on the floor, etc? And you go to the bathroom or leave your hotel room and come back and realize it is beyond obvious what has happened. It needed a name.

“I just got done cleaning up the sex tornado. I think we are due for another storm tomorrow night.”

Everyday Glitter

Things I have already done with Penelope: Dressed her up in Macy’s puppy clothes, filmed a forthcoming episode of the Lesbian Tea Basket, cuddled with her while watching a Mandy Moore movie.

Things I intend to do with Penelope: Read her Charlotte’s Web, watch Babe: Pig in the City (so she starts to understand what happens when her momma takes her out on a leash), take glamorous photos of me all dressed up holding a piglet.

NYC April 14! Queer Performance and Dance Party Rebel Cupcake 12: I Love Lucy

Booking for a monthly show is so heartwarming. I get to share some of my favorite artists with my crowd and create a special alchemy of performances to fit certain themes and, always, leave the audience feeling good and ready to dance, mingle and let their lights shine. Sometimes I day dream about who I would have at a show if I had a big budget and could fly someone in every month.

Serendipity often has a hand in determining the line-up for my show, and this month’s Rebel Cupcake she really came through. Not one but two of my favorite out of town beauties are in town for Rebel Cupcake–I hope if you are near NYC you’ll come out!

The photo booth is black and white in honor of the I Love Lucy theme. Optional dress code is to serve Ricky, Lucy, Ethel or Fred. Save $2 off the door by signing up for our texty texty list (promise no spam).

Ways to Tell a Queer Femme is Queer

The problem is, there is no one “us.” Identities like Femme are deeply personal and there’s no one way to be Femme. There are certainly overlapping characteristics and generalizations that exist–which is how we find each other and create community. Tenderly paw in paw we find ourselves a niche (or several) in queerdom. But it is essentialist to say “This is a trait common amongst Femmes,” because as soon as you think you’ve isolated one commonality about Femmes you’ll find a whole pile of Femmes who belie that trait. This is simultaneously awesome and complicated when you’re trying to spot a Femme in the wild.

Valentine’s Day Weekend Non-Stop Queer Style

This year’s Valentine’s Day weekend was glamorous and non-stop. There was an intense agenda of queer happenings and what better way to get my feet back into the Brooklyn swing of things after my extended sojourn in San Francisco* than to try to do everything? It began with Rebel Cupcake 10: Erotic City on Thursday, February 10th.

Some of you might be wondering how I can maintain this stamina. The key is that I don’t drink much (one or two well-timed drinks max) and I wear flat shoes when I intend to dance a lot. At the end of this whirlwind weekend my feet were actually quite sore, but I felt deliriously happy and incubated in this amazing community of artists and friends that make Brooklyn my home. A community kind of love, really.

Wyatt Riot on New Episode of the Lesbian Tea Basket

I love traveling queers! Wyatt Riot quit his job and life and hit the road. He’s living the dream! I ask him about that and his fashion on the latest episode of the Lesbian Tea Basket! (And review Stash Lemon Ginger tea.)

Special Discount for World Famous *BOB*’s One Woman Show!

Hey Unicorns! I’ve been busy having my Plus Size Party Girl (thanks Time Out New York for that press quote about me) gaycation in San Francisco, but things are still rolling along back home. World Famous *BOB* has generously given my readers a special discount to go see her one woman show next weekend!

It is playing February 3rd, 4th and 5th at Wild Project in Alphabet City (NYC). Here is the link for discount tickets.

Art and Soul Tomorrow/Cupcake Cabaret on Friday (as part of Quorum Forum)

I am really excited to be producing this celebration of self-love at this amazing free, community festival of queer magic in the middle of Winter. I’m calling Quorum Forum the Queer Winter Olympics. And thrilled to bring together this awesome line-up of performers. I hope you can make it! If anyone can video tape it please let me know!

Unicorn Party

When one has friends scattered throughout the world and Facebook links us together, we get to have intense fear of missing out (FOMO) when we see all of the amazing photos and events going on without us. KFW lives in Oakland* and I live in Brooklyn and I have never experienced such intense “I WISH I COULD HAVE BEEN THERE” as when I heard about the Unicorn Party she threw.

Hard Candy Christmas

And, yeah, it’s sort of sad and isolating sometimes to be single at the holidays and not with your family or whatever. But then I remember my very saddest Christmas ever, when my ex-fiance and I had just broken up the month before, I was going to California to see my family without him on a trip we had booked together. I remember waking up on Christmas day with this ache in my chest, knowing he was with his new girlfriend and her family I couldn’t even begin to think about what to think about through all of that sad. It was so crushing.

This year I’ve been hearing about everyone’s hard candy. Having a family or not having a family is hard. Both are hard. There’s either the pain and isolation/liberation and joy of not having obligations on the holidays. Or there’s the expectations upon expectations upon performance upon pleasing everyone upon love upon celebration of being with family. I think hard candy is part of life and it can bring you sweetness or toothaches. It’s just how you saddle up for the ride.

As a Happy Holidays from me to you, I present this touching video from Rebel Cupcake 7: We <3 Dolly, burlesque legend of our time World Famous *BOB* performing Hard Candy Christmas.

Winter Layering with Style

Something that unifies skirt and dress-loving people this time of year is how to stay warm as well as stylish. As a native Californian who moved to the East Coast ten years ago I have developed some coping mechanisms to maintain my stylish exterior as much as possible while still being a total cry baby about how cold it is outside.