We've officially been LA residents for three months! I got my CA Driver's License finally. I got my DL when I was 17 and living in the Bay Area, so they managed to find my old record and give me my old number. (Big Brother is real.) I had a little disagreement with the entirely pleasant clerk who took my application. I stated "red" on the hair color question. However, I actually identify my hair color as "Ginger Spice." She had to fight me about whether I am blonde because when I was 16 and got my permit I was blonde. I don't identify as blonde but I guess because of bureaucracy that's what is happening on my ID. Lots of people don't have their true identities on these documents and I'd rather work towards a third no gender marker on IDs than self-selected hair color.
Hey it's British National Tea Day! What better way to celebrate than to tell you my favorite tea accessories and chronicle my day's tea drinking on Instagram?
First and foremost is the proper loose tea brewing accessory. Before I upgraded I thought I was fine with a tea ball, a mesh contraption that holds tea like a tea bag does. Wrong. Life is so much better and tea brews so much better with a cup shaped infuser. It's a $10 investment in your tea drinking happiness.
I picture my life as a two lane highway through gorgeous countryside/forest/oceanside (those are my favorite roads). Being on the pavement is "balance." That's feeling like I'm getting things done, going in forward motion and taking care of myself in the ways I need--mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.
Life happens and I'm constantly course correcting back and forth across the pavement until I sync up with it again. And then the road starts curving or somehow I veer off the road and then I am doing it again, course correcting until I get back on the pavement.
Life is inevitable forward motion and inevitable curves. I'm just always working to make sure that the road is pretty, mostly enjoyable to drive and that I make sure to appreciate the view. I'm not always on the pavement.
So here's Zak, this great dude I've only just met whose work already has been an intimately helpful part of my life, and he says that he and his business partners at Good For Me Lifestyle have a new product they are unveiling. He literally whips out a box of superfoods to let me taste. A whole fleet of superfoods infused in delicious raw honey.
"Hell yes I would like to try those," I said.
Here are some things I didn't know about pools until recently. The unheated pool temperature will be an average of the daytime and nighttime temp. So even if temps soar into the 80s, if they're dropping to 50s at night (which is possible here, and lately we've been more early 70s and sometimes 40s at night) that means the pool is way too cold to swim in during the day at about the 60s. Brrr. Heating a pool is mad expensive if you do it all the time, so most folks do it on special occasions. My grandmother has a pool and even though she's been in her house in Rancho Mirage (by Palm Springs) for 15 years I've literally been in the pool twice.
It was stressful, though, going to see a "health" practitioner for the first time. Not knowing if they were going to be fatphobic or not. I want a doctor who treats me as a human and not as a number on a scale. I wore a full face of make-up because that makes me feel better, and I was ready to recite to the doctor things about health at every size.
I got nervous in the room waiting for her because there were not just one but three posters about weight loss stuff. They have SIX weight loss/"health" programs, and I'll say I feel glad for it if simply because by offering them for free they are taking money away from the billion dollar diet industry. You can give Oprah your money at Weight Watchers (right now I'm not paying any money for Oprah things, she can just take her billions from toxic diet culture she doesn't need my money), or you can get free nutrition counseling on the phone from Kaiser or one of the other five programs. Or, you can love your body as it is and work on your overall health and wellness and learning to be in loving communication with your body about what it needs because your size doesn't need to change for you to be a whole, worthy human being. That's the tactic I've been using and my happiness is pretty great.
You all know that Dolly Parton is one of my heroes. She taught me to Dream More. It's part of her four pillars of success, as she outlined to the University of Tennessee graduating class commencement speech and then elaborated in her book Dream More. (I highly suggest the audio book read by Dolly herself.)
Dolly says, “If your actions create a legacy that inspires others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, then, you are an excellent leader.” That's what I work to do with this blog, and that's what I'm hoping to support with this Reiki-infused tea business!
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I am really happy to report that the work that Dara and I employed to mitigate the stress on our relationship has been wildly successful. Every step of the way we have been having fun together and able to feel completely supported. Even when we both have mini-breakdowns under the stress of the transition. Even when we sometimes get snippy with each other.
These are strategies that are really great regardless of whether or not you are going through a big life transition!
I'm loving these weekly check-ins about the transition to LA. I keep reminding myself of the power of six months, that in six months everything will be different, settled, and all of this transitioning stuff won't be in the forefront of my mind all the time.
There's so much more to the transition than I thought there would be. I guess I thought I could prepare and plan enough, since I spent months preparing and planning for the move. But I don't think I had any idea what kind of energy it requires to not know where anything is and get acclimated to a whole new place. Most of the time when I've moved in the past I had at least a passing comfort with the neighborhood.
It has long been my wish to retire from the practice of law in order to follow my dreams. For years I thought about it, but had no idea how it could happen.
Eventually I managed to work part time in law and part time advancing my work to help make the world safe for people to love themselves. Moving across the country, out of the states I’m licensed in and having to leave my private practice has really kicked this into high gear. This is the time in my life to gamble on myself… can I do like Mariah Carey and Make it Happen? Will you help by buying some tea or sharing with your networks?
Creating my own line of Reiki-infused teas is one of my biggest dreams, and I'm taking the first steps in order to turn it into a goal. After all, goals are dreams with deadlines!