You need to shop for the holidays and you want to dismantle the patriarchy? Me, too! Supporting small businesses owned by women, queers, people of color and other minorities warms the cockles of my heart. Since my wealth is more in influence than it is in bucks for the time being, one of my favorite holiday blog traditions is my gift guide!
I have been doing a gift guide* for almost as many years as I've been blogging here (since 2008) and I always center work by queer, POC and women owned businesses. Now, more than ever, we need to be mindful about where we are putting our dollars! If you can buy your holiday gifts or handle your self pampering needs by supporting artists and businesses that are facing a loss of protection after Drumpf's election, you are able to do a really concrete thing to help folks out. Money is energy in 3D form--it is important to put a damn in Capitalism, reroute it away from corporations and into the hands of folks whose lives will improve because of it!
I was so excited to hear that Beth was working on a new line and it launched Monday at 3AM Pacific Time! First thing I did this morning was browse the collection.
This time Beth is doing it herself as an indie designer--no corporation. Everything is made in factories in NYC and she's gotten input from her designer friends to help put it together. Beth says herself these are investment pieces, and she's right. They are priced like indie designer pieces but from what I can tell via the internet look totally worth it. Timeless and well conceived. I can't wait to hear from folks their feedback about the fit and fabric!
It’s Cyber Monday again (I kind of still hate that it’s a thing now but it’s a thing now). I believe in putting a dam in Capitalism wherever possible. If I have some wealth, I am going to redirect it…
One of the blog posts that continues to get the most traffic for me is my original post about thigh chafing prevention. The summer is hot and sweaty, if you have any fat at all in your thighs regardless of your gender you may be prone to getting uncomfortable rashes between your legs. You can also get rashes anywhere skin touches and gets sweaty like under bellies or arms. I have heard reports from men who wear jeans that they can get chub rub on the parts of their thighs that meet above the leg holes.
Finding great prevention for chub rub revolutionized my wardrobe because I never thought I could wear dresses. Chub rub prevention allows me such versatility!
What better way to set goals and mark time than with a calendar that acknowledges queer bodies and lots of different bodies! I think it is incredibly powerful self-love to surround yourself with images of hot queer and fat folks who have diverse bodies. Sensitizing yourself to queer and fat bodies that look like yours and the people you love is an important part of loving yourself and/or being a good fat/queer ally.
It's Cyber Monday (I kind of hate that it's a thing now but it's a thing now) and I am fresh from watching so many movies about how the spirit of the holidays is not about capitalism it's about feeling warm and generous. I, personally, love all things glitter and magical and really appreciate the holidays in a take what you like and leave the rest sort of way. I love that people decorate their houses in glitter and lights. I also enjoy supporting small businesses and queer owned businesses. So if you're going to participate in gift giving, I'm super into connecting people to small businesses. I'm also into giving people good gift ideas.
My holiday gift guide this year is not compensated--I included small businesses owned by folks I know and indie businesses suggested by my followers who commented on my instagram and facebook posts asking for their favorites. I also threw in a couple of wild cards from more corporate origins that were just good gift suggestions for folks struggling with what to give. I've got ideas for the femmes, queers, masculine of center, pets and woo/spiritual folks on your list!
My astrologer once told me that money is energy in 3D form and I totally believe in being mindful about putting your energy out there, especially when you're doing holiday shopping. So here is a big list of possible holiday gifts for all kinds of folks on your list, enjoy!
I knew instinctively that I was wrong for hiding my arms. It was uncomfortable and annoying and I wanted to feel the freedom of my skinny counterparts. I had a couple of tank tops as layering pieces and I started to open myself up to the idea of wearing them, and set a goal to be wearing them outside by the next year. I wasn’t sure exactly how, but I was going to do it.
If you want to do things differently, you need only set your mind to it. If you’ve been spending your summers all bottled up under hoodies or wearing pants even though you would be way more comfortable in shorts, you can move past your fear and shame and start being more confident.
This is a post I meant to include in Femme Sex Week that got a little thwarted waiting for some interviews to come in. So in the meantime let’s just call this the BEST FEMME STOCKING STUFFER EVER in all of the myriad of entendres that can be.
A little warning that the content of this post is sexually explicit because I talk about sex and so it is NSFW if your work doesn’t like photos of sex toys. (They’re still life, not being used but still, does your boss need to see a photo of a huge hot pink cock?)
Nicky pointed out to me at the last WHAM BAM! that floral prints are all the rage in the queer scene--especially for the masculine of center crowd. "Flower bois," they said (pronounced "bwah" here). "They're everywhere."
They were right. I've been seeing it everywhere. Florals are all over menswear. I love it, especially because it's a little gender bendy. It's the same reason I love pink on butches--it's one of my favorite colors and I like butches. Together, it is pleasing. I love a bold floral print and I love seeing it on my fashionable friends.